How to Have a Spa Day at Home
Spa day packages often include a variety of services in a full or half day package and usually offer add on services such as:
manicure
pedicure
facial
body scrub
body wrap
hydrotherapy soak
lunch
massage
So let’s say a full spa day at a nice location will have four services and lunch for around $500 before tip. If you’re willing to spend 10% of that (aka $50—math is hard sometimes) then WHEW you’re about to have a stellar spa day at home!
Manicure + Pedicure
Let’s start with the ones that are easy to do for yourself: manicure and pedicure. Personally, I like to prep everything for my mani-pedi and then paint once I’m in the tub. I know this sound chaotic and that’s because it is. That’s how I like it, ok? You probably have your standard nail file, nail clippers, and polish remover and polish if you’re going to paint up your digits. Get your nails extra prepped by softening your cuticles in soapy water, pushing them back where they came from, and then trimming them - bye bye! You can get all the tools you need for this more salon-level treatment here for $16 if you don’t already have them.
Facial, part 1
While you’re not likely to spend the full 60 minutes doing your own facial that the esthetician might in a spa setting, you can still do something multi-step and powerful! The essential steps are the same.
Cleanse - your regular cleanser is honestly fine for this! If you want to get fancy, bust out one that you use only occasionally.
Exfoliate - I love the Five Minute Facial by Beauty Pie for only $17. I always feel like I get a good scrub and slough off any dead skin cells while adding some well-vetted ingredients into the mix (glycolic and salicylic acids).
Steam - Ok, so like I was saying earlier about how I do my nail prep and then paint in the tub? Well, if you’re wild like me, you can do triple duty and use the bath tub moment as your facial steam as well. I’m sure some folks will frown on this, but we don’t got all day, baby!
Ok so if you’re with me so far, we have cleansed and exfoliated our face then prepped our nails (hands and feet) for our mid-bath mani-pedi. Next up…
Body Scrub
I like to do my body scrub in two parts, while standing in the tub (less mess). First, I start with my dry brush and brush my whole body to do an initial exfoliation. I know it sounds weird, but it feels amazing and has some good health benefits. A dry brush will run you about $10. Next, I use whatever body scrub I’m trying out at the moment. I don’t have a favorite and I like to try different ones. They tend to have the same essential qualities of some kind of sugar or salt granule to exfoliate and some kind of oil as a smoother. So now you’re lathered up in salty or sugary goodness and you’re ready for your…
Hydrotherapy Soak
AKA Bath
Hop in the tub, steam your face, relax your body, paint your nails, and sip a beverage of your choice while listening to some relaxing music (I truly just search “spa” on Spotify and roll with whatever comes up).
Facial, part 2
4. Extract - After you hop out of the tub, you’ll want to double wash your hands before touching your face (because just duh). But now is the perfect time to do some blackhead extractions and so on if you’ve got some buggers annoying your poor little pores. Just remember not to over do it. Less is more. You’re not a professional.
5. Mask - I also sometimes have tried this part in the tub, but given the steam factor, you can see why I’ve come to my senses and recommend that you do this outside the tub, after you’ve soaked and wrapped yourself in a cozy robe. Slather your face in your favorite mask. Mine is this charcoal detoxifying mask from Beauty Pie for $16 (you sensing a trend here?) If I’m feeling extra extra, then I’ll use a hydrating sheet mask after that; T. J. Maxx usually has some decent deals on a Dr. Jart mask!
Alright, alright, alright. You’re waiting for your mask to do its thing and make your face better. In the mean time, order yourself some food. That’s right. A spa offers a nice meal delivered right to you in your robe. But you know who else offers that? Postmates. This is where the rest of the cost of a home spa day comes in for me! After you’ve ordered, put your phone away and remove your mask and return to the rest of your facial routine:
Facial, part 3
6. Treat - Pay attention to what your own skin needs and treat accordingly. I usually spot treat for acne with some essential serums from the Ordinary because (again) powerful ingredients + value price = take Emma’s money, please.
7. Moisturize - Lock in those serums with a serious moisturizer. You’re not going anywhere this evening, right? So if it was me, I’d lather it on and pick something like the Overnight Skin Perfector 2.0 and just call it a day.
8. Massage - You can learn to massage your own face! This has been a game-changer for me as someone with TMD issues. Look up some YouTube videos and use a gua sha if you have it (if not, your hands will work just fine - God’s built-in massagers, as I call ‘em).
Usually all of this takes me about 3 hours. If I’m getting super fancy, I’ll book a $60 massage for myself at Donelson Massage before I begin the rest of my spa day and I’ll show up early to take advantage of their hot tea, massage chairs in the waiting area, and general relaxing atmosphere. Now, you’ve checked off everything on the list the Big Spa wants you to pay half a grand for!
Before you get going
If you’ve gotten this far, you might actually be taking me seriously (I mean, I do but I don’t expect you to). You might find it helpful to have a list of what to prepare before you get started on any of this:
Clean, dry towels for your body by your bath tub
Big, comfy robe with the tie (don’t leave the tie in the laundry! You’ll be sad)
One small hand towel by the tub for your hands while you’re in the tub (trust me)
Large water (iced is preferable) in a non-glass container with a lid (I have managed to spill into the tub before)
Fancy beverage of your choice (can of Ranch water, plastic cup of wine, as you will)
Your phone plugged in near enough that you can hear your spa music, but not so near that you’ll actually use it
A candle or two for ambiance (but make sure it’s away from walls and curtains)
Nail clippers, cuticle pushers, polish remover, cotton pads, new polish color
Facial cleanser
Facial exfoliant
Dry brush
Body exfoliant
Facial mask(s)
P.S. Want to be an extra nice partner? Set up a home spa day for your S.O. Make sure to include their favorite things Jackson gets eye patches since a sheet mask won’t stick to his beard, a beer of his preference, and the silliest “manly” smelling candle I can find.
6 Things I’ve Learned About Summers as a Doc Student
As a doc student, I tend to work about 70ish hours a week.
Yep.
The summer, then, is a welcome respite from the barrage of classes, teaching, organizing, writing, researching, reading that defines the other 10 months of the year.
A lot of folks, however, mistakenly interpret a doctoral student’s more flexible summer schedule as “time off.” Ha! I wish. Let me tell you. Vanderbilt does not pay me during the summer (ironically justifying this as giving me a break) and under pays me during the year (I make about $5/hour when you do the math). So, the summer is a time when my grad student friends and I all have to scramble to figure out how to eat and keep a roof over our heads without totally abandoning the study program we’ve laid out for ourselves during the summer months and without working as many hours as in the school year.
I have yet to find a great balance and this is my final in-between-years summer as I’m a rising 5th year and candidacy means I’m in the dissertation phase. This frustrating cycle that could be broken with a 12-month pay system from Vanderbilt at the rate of an actual living wage (cough cough Peabody…). But since the powers that be have resisted respectful requests for policy changes that would honor the humanity of students, it looks like this will be ongoing for incoming Vanderbilt doc students.
I thought I’d give a little run down on some of the things I’ve learned being subjected to this system. Take some or none, but here’s my experience:
1. Take a break. You need it.
You’ve been working hard all year. Too hard, probably. Don’t gaslight yourself by internalizing all those voices from professors, advisers, other students with poor boundaries, and your own drive - you are a human being and you both need and deserve some down time so that you can keep giving your best when it’s time to be on. I highly recommend taking the first two weeks after the semester ends completely off. It’s usually the last two weeks of May. Do the math for your finances and give yourself at least those two weeks.
2. Go somewhere.
If you can, go somewhere, anywhere! Whether it’s a trip home to see family, a beach vacation (if you have a partner with a steady income and can afford a trip), or simply a budget camping experience nearby, get out of your normal routine and zone. In years where we had more cash, we took a four-day trip to the beach (Florida or Tulum - our favorite). In the leaner years, we’ve found free campsites 90 minutes outside of Nashville, packed up what would be our normal groceries for a few days, and gotten out of town. A change of scenery is a great way to jumpstart your “new normal” routine for the summer.
3. Get some extra income.
During the year, it’s basically impossible (and discouraged via policy) to hold a second job that would compensate your school “income” / stipend to make it a living wage. Summer, then, becomes the ideal time to find a lucrative activity that will buy you some breathing room when you’re not getting paid and maybe even allow you to save up for a small extra fund that you can dip into throughout the year. For me, the summer is when I do the bulk of my graphic and web design work. In the past, Jackson has bartended (late nights but great tips!) and I’ve worked at summer camps. Find something that will pay you $25+ an hour, not require more than 50 hours a week, and leaves you some down time. I really recommend picking something that isn’t school-related. Save your brain energy for thinking on your own time rather than slaving away for someone else’s research project.
4. Make some goals.
Perhaps while you’re away or simply once you get home, plan out the main things you want to accomplish during your summer months. Think about how you want to feel this summer. I suggest three categories: for me, for school, for others. Pick something you want to accomplish for you (“Run 5 miles at a 6 mph pace” or “Learn to cook that one polenta dish”), something you want/need to get done for school (“Write the first chapter/paper of my dissertation”), and something you want to do for others (“Write a letter once a week” or “Volunteer three times with my community garden”). These are likely things you feel you don’t have time for during the rest of the year. You will feel both accomplished and rested at the end of the summer.
5. Create a reasonable timeline.
Once you have your goals, consider a reasonable - REASONABLE - timeline for getting those things done. Like a timeline that a normal job would expect, not one that the high pressured demands of grad school have made you think are normal. Sometimes less is more. I usually try to front load my weeks so that I can cut off Friday around 3 pm. And I don’t work more than the standard 40 during the summer.
6. Take your weekends off—actually.
As a doctoral student, you likely work on weekends, late nights, kind of all the time. I’ve found that I’m only realistically able to take my whole weekends off during the summer. This isn’t totally uncommon in the kinds of jobs you’re likely applying to after you finish your PhD, so we have to find some balance. Try scheduling one day (Friday, Saturday, or Sunday) to have absolutely nothing on the calendar - not even drinks with friends. Just let that day evolve and go with the flow. Save it for the things you want to do or feel you need to do that get piled up during the rest of the week.
I hope you are able to sleep in, read a book for fun, and ignore the imposter syndrome rants in your brain for a few sunny weeks!
xo
em
A Breath Practice for Lent
Before we get into this breath practice, take a moment to observe yourself. What emotions are you feeling right now? How does your body feel?
Set a timer for 10 minutes and promise yourself this space to rest and rejuvenate.
Find a comfortable position (sitting, standing in mountain pose, lying down) and remove as many distractions as you can from your immediate environment (phone, email, looming tasks). Now commit to this time and to completing this practice for yourself.
RHYTHM:
inhale for four counts, hold in for two counts
exhale for four counts, hold out for two counts.
INHALE
I breathe in your tender love, Spirit.
EXHALE
Your love and life flow into me and through me.
repeat for ten breaths
(adapted from Savored By Your Savior: A Lent Community Group Guide
by Rev. Dr. Courtney Grager)
Thank yourself for taking this time to connect. Thank the Spirit for unconditional love and presence. Go forth in your day knowing you have never been alone or abandoned. You are cherished, whole as you are, and worthy.
Thoughts On Lent
I’ve been putting off writing this. Lent is a season that I love not because I like it, but because I know it’s good for me. It connects me to the church more broadly, to innumerable ancestors (by blood or creed), and to the Spirit. Returning to reading Bread and Wine this season, a Lenten reader with a great number of voices, I find myself surrounded immersed in the thoughtful writing of some of these folks who have gone before me.
While lent historically is a season of fasting, the idea of fasting isn’t just about giving something up. Fasting allows us to surrender something regular in our daily rounds of life in order to leverage that space and time for prayer and meditation. In the past, I’ve even added a practice for lent, like daily journaling or 10 minutes of meditation in the morning. So, I’ve been trying to identify what I might remove in my life to make space and what I might use that space to do.
I considered forfeiting:
wine
swearing
social media
bread
Ya know. Just a few of my favorite things.
And then I saw it. Perhaps you did too. It seems so obvious once it’s written out. Wine. Bread. Bread and Wine.
Communion is my favorite part of a church service. Not just because it’s a wee snack, but because it’s tangible. All the senses get working during communion. The pastor placing the elements in my hand, the words accompanying the sacrament, the wine waking up my tastebuds, the chapel’s cedar wood aroma, the semi-circle of co-congregants by my side.
Instead of forfeiting all bread and wine (because woof), I’m repurposing my normal bread and wine consumption for a meditative, at-home (because isn’t everything right now) communion time every evening. I’m looking forward to how this changes my relationship with:
evenings
the Holy Spirit
flavor
fermentation
prayer
Stay connected, folks.
xo
em
Goodbye, wallpaper. Hello, paint!
When wallpaper is too expensive but you still want a pop of color and pattern in a space, painting is the way to go.